Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Remembering World League Football with Pro Set

Stan Gelbaugh
Quarterback, London Monarchs
1991 Pro Set #704

Pro Set Fact: Named World League's offensive most valuable player after leading London Monarchs to title in 1991.
GMT Fact: Named World League's most offensive mustache after gluing a caterpillar on his upper lip in 1991.


Wayne Davis
Linebacker, Orlando Thunder
1991 pro Set #23

Pro Set Fact: Two-year National Football League veteran was top overall selection among linebackers in the 1991 World League Draft.
GMT Fact: First World League linebacker to dress like a "G-d damn" lemon-lime popsicle.



Roman Gabriel
Head Coach, Raleigh-Durham Skyhawks
1991 Pro Set #24

Pro Set Fact: Former all-pro quarterback and most valuable player in 1969.
GMT Fact: When Gabriel heard the coaching gig came with free red slacks and a Haines 50/50 ash-colored sweatshirt with a poor man's stealth bomber on it, the deal was sealed. To make said deal official, Gabriel simply shot the Skyhawks owner the old finger gun and winked.



Jason Garrett

Quarterback, San Antonio Riders
1991 Pro Set #31

Pro Set Fact: Ivy League Player of the Year while at Princeton in 1988.
GMT Fact: Today, no one would know who Jason Garrett was had he not starred opposite Jim Carrey in the Truman Show.



Todd Hammel
Quarterback, New York-New Jersey Knights
1991 Pro Set #19

Pro Set Fact: Also was in camp with Atlanta Falcons
GMT Fact: No helmet can possibly contain Todd's massive f*cking cranium and aerodynamic mullet made of space age polymers.

Kay Stephenson
Head Coach, Sacramento Surge
1991 Pro Set #27

Pro Set Fact: Former Buffalo Bills head coach was in real estate business in Florida when Surge came calling.
GMT Fact: Stephenson remains the first and only real estate agent ever hired to coach both an NFL and WL football team. Can still get you a great deal on a 3-bedroom, 2-bath in Bocca.


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Video: I Got Baseball Cards



Via: @HarrisonKeith

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Friday, June 19, 2009

Pro Softball's First Superstar

Jerry: What happened?

Kramer: Well, you know, we were playing a game and, you know, I was pitching, and I was really throwing some smoke. And Joe Pepitone, he was up, and man that guy, you know, he was crowding the plate.

Jerry: Wow! Joe Pepitone!

Kramer: Yeah, well, Joe Pepitone or not, I own the inside of that plate. So I throw one, you know, inside, you know, a little chin music, put him right on his pants. Cause I gotta intimidate when I'm on the mound. Well the next pitch, he's right back in the same place. So, I had to plunk him.

Jerry: You plunked him.

Kramer: Oh yeah. Well, he throws down his bat, he comes racing up to the mound. Next thing, both benches are cleared, you know? A brouhaha breaks out between the guys in the camp, you know, and the old Yankee players, and as I'm trying to get Moose Skowron off of one of my teammates, you know, somebody pulls me from behind, you know, and I turned around and I popped him. I looked down, and woah man, it's Mickey. I punched his lights out.

---

I'd bet to say that none such shenanigans ever happened in the American Professional Slo-Pitch League where Pepi was treated as royalty.




Oh and for all you Philly readers and WIP listeners out there, check out who rode the pine for the Philadelphia Athletics club back in '78...none other than Ray Didenger:


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Monday, June 1, 2009

Philadelphia's B & G's Ice Cream & Sports Bar

Via Philadelphia's City Paper: "Ben Gollotti, who's been selling sports memorabilia for 35 years, opened this combo shop — collectibles and ice cream! — in the Italian Market two weeks back."

See also: Baseball cards and banana splits: B & G’s Sports & Ice Cream Bar (Meal Ticket)


B & G's Ice Cream & Sports Bar
814 S. Ninth St., 215-218-9923

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Saturday, May 30, 2009

Topps Gives Us Head(s Up)

Knock. Knock.

Who's there?

Kebon Meeshle.



Kevin Mitchell
Outfielder, San Francisco Giants
1990 Topps Heads-Up #15

Topps Fact: None given.
GMT Fact: Mitchell decapitated the cat of a former live-in girlfriend.

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Tuesday, April 28, 2009

HHR: 1977: The Year of the Pro Slo-Pitch Player

The 70's was a different era. It was a time when a man was a man, and wasn't afraid to flaunt his masculinity.

It was also a time of cockamamie ideas as evidenced by the short-lived and ill-fated American Professional Slo-Pitch League - a startup founded by a gentleman named Bill Bryne that featured a dozen teams, including the manly Pittsburgh Hardhats, Kentucky Bourbons, and perhaps the toughest team of all, the Minnesota Goofy's.

Click Here to Learn More.



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Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Unconventional Methods


Brady Anderson
Outfielder, Baltimore Orioles
1991 Donruss #668

Donruss Fact: Career Homeruns (3 Seasons): 8
GMT Fact: Taking a page from Looney Toons, Anderson stepped into the batters box in '91 with an unheard of 7 bats in his hand. When that did little to improve his power numbers, he turned to sticking needles in his ass.


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Have You Gotten Your BlogsWithBalls Tickets Yet?


Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Who are three people who have never been in my kitchen?

Ooooh sorry. The correct question was, "Who are 1984's three AL active career strikeout leaders, two of which will never be Hall of Famers?"


Bert Blyleven
Pitcher, Cleveland Indians
Don Sutton
Pitcher, Milwaukee Brewers
Jerry Koosman
Pitcher, Chicago White Sox
1984 Topps #716

Have You Gotten Your BlogsWithBalls Tickets Yet?
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Friday, April 3, 2009

Cocaine is a Powerful Drug


Doc Gooden
Pitcher, New York Mets
1993 Topps Stadium Club #514

Topps Fact: Rookie Card 1984 Topps Traded
GMT Fact: While most people remember Gooden as a pitcher, when times got tough and Doc needed a quick score, certain pushers in Harlem (and certain Topps photographers) insisted he turn around and be a catcher.

Note: For the life of me, I can't figure out the stat line on this card. It must be an error, no? It has Gooden playing 31 games, hitting .255 with 93 runs, 11 HRs and 86 RBI.


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Have You Gotten Your BlogsWithBalls Tickets Yet?

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Evidence Barry Bonds Was Juicing in 1991


While many point to the 1998 McGuire-Sosa homerun chase as the pivotal point in which Barry Bonds decided he longed for the attention that went with being the greatest player on the planet, I recently uncovered indisputible evidence that Bonds was using anabolic steroids as early as 1991.

Bonds' '92 Score "'91 Score All Star Team" card clearly shows a head an estimated 125% the size of his torso. 'Splain that.

Barry Bonds
Left Fielder, Pittsburgh Pirates
1992 Score #777

Score Fact: Barry can pretty much do it all.
GMT Fact: Barry's an asshole.


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Monday, March 9, 2009

Giff Likes His Backfields in Motion


Kathie Lee Gifford
Wife, New York Giants
1992 Pro Line Portraits #12

Pro Line Fact: "...I see Frank enjoying football after all this time, and if anybody had a right to be tired of it, it would be Frank."
GMT Fact: Funny, Frank felt the same way about his marriage.

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Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Baseball's Folk Hero

Dan Boone
Relief Pitcher, Baltimore Orioles
1991 Score #715

Score Fact: The most heart-warming story of '90 might just be the return to baseball of Dan, the seventh generation nephew of the famous frontiersman.
GMT Fact: Boone was once ejected from a game for circling the bull pen car around Joel Youngblood and trying to give him 'blankets.'

GMT Bonus Fact: Dan was 36 when Score deemed him a "Rookie Prospect." At 36 Daniel Boone was slaughtering Indians in Kentucky like it were his job, whereas Dan felt the need to carry on the family name by harassing Chief Wahoo in Cleveland.


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Thursday, February 19, 2009

Bafangool, NPH!


Steve Sax
Second Baseman, Los Angeles Dodgers
1988 Topps Big #46

Topps Fact: Steve was NL Rookie of the Year in 1982.
GMT Fact: Despite several forgettable TV appearances including roles on Sabrina the Teenage Witch, The Simpsons, Who's the Boss and Square Pegs, Steve never got over the fact he was passed over for the role of Vinny Delpino in favor of Max Castella on Doogie Howser, M.D. The other shoe dropped when Bobby Deniro laughed in his face (a little bit) when he expressed his interest in playing the overrated actor's son Calogero Anello in 1993's overrated stereotypical Italian-American flick A Bronx Tale.

In turn, he took his frustration out on Tommy Lasorda, defense and "hot trim everywhere."

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Friday, February 13, 2009

And...BOOM Goes the Quarterback


Gary Hogeboom
Quarterback, Phoenix Cardinals
1990 Score #529

Score Fact: With Neil Lomax out the whole '89 season (and subsequently retired), Gary, who signed as a Plan B free agent, became a valuable starter.
GMT Fact: When Plan B fell through, Gary opted for Plan C: identity fraud. In 2005, Hogeboom was a contestant on Survivor: Guatemala, on which he posed as landscaper named Gary Hawkins. His cover went boom when a fellow contestant, Kansas sportscaster and pageant queen Danni Boatwright, pointed out that she recognized the then 47-year-old ex-NFL quarterback. Viewers cried foul, because, let's face it, Gary's parents couldn't pick him out of a lineup.



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Friday, February 6, 2009

Just Like His Sister


Scott Hamilton
Figure Skater, Team USA
1991 Impel US Olympic Cards

Impel Fact: "At age nine he wanted to learn to skate like his sister..."
GMT Fact: Of course he did.

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Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Keith Jackson's 227 Audition Photo

Keith Jackson
Tight End, Miami Dolphins
1993 Classic Pro Line Profiles #524

Pro Line Fact: When Keith Jackson was growing up in Little Rock, Arkansas, his mother Gladys had to work two jobs to provide for Keith, his brother Byron, and his sister Gwenitt.
GMT Fact: Following his mother's example, Keith sought additional employment by testing his acting chops. He was said to have auditioned for the role of 227's Lester Jenkins by simply handing them the family photo that wound up on his 1993 Classic Pro Line Profile card. Ultimately, he lost out to Sanford & Son's Officer Smitty, Hal Williams.

Friday, January 16, 2009

Bobby Grich's Specialty


Bob Grich
Second Baseman, California Angels
1984 Topps #315

Topps Fact: Walloped 2 Homers at Kansas City, 6-25-83
GMT Fact: Walloped George Brett and Dan Quisenberry with 2 of his patented "stink palms" following the game.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Stop Me If You've Heard This One...

A Bush, A Dick, A Colin and An A-Hole walk into a war...


President George H.W. Bush
Commander in Cheif, United States of America
1991 Topps Desert Storm - 3rd Series #177



Secretary Dick Cheney
Secretary of Defense, United States of America
1991 Topps Desert Storm - 3rd Series #179

General Colin Powell
Chairman, Joint Chiefs of Staff
1991 Topps Desert Storm #2

Saddam Hussein
Dictatorial President, Iraq
1991 Topps Desert Storm - 3rd Series #189

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Jerry Reed, Madball


Jerry Reed
Pitcher, Seattle Mariners
1990 Dunruss #614

Donruss Fact: 2nd on Mariners in appearances in '88 and 3rd in '89.
GMT Fact: Was immortalized as the iconic 80's Madball "Screamin' Meemie."

Friday, November 21, 2008

Before They Were Stars

I came across a goldmine of unintentional comedy when I recently inherited a 1980 Philadelphia Phillies yearbook.

I'll be periodically scanning things in and posting both here and at HHR.

Before they were big league juicers and heart breakers, Bret and Aaron Boone appeared in the yearbook with their parents and younger brother, Matthew, whom they now affectionately refer to as the "Cooper Manning" of the family.